Stages of Zima's Blog

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Letting go

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Buzz Lightyear

My son's favorite character--age 4

I’m officially moving my blog to Word Press…here’s my last post from blogspot now moved over.

Ok, so the kid is only days away from turning 13, so why the post of “letting go?”  Because, I think as a mom, you have to let go at every stage of development.  Kids, after about age one, spend the rest of their childhood pushing you away, so that by the time you send them off into the big bad world, you’re ready.  (I also think that the teen years is the way to make you WANT to let them go.  By the time they hit 16, you’re thinking “Oh dear Lord, if we can survive THIS…we might make it!”)

But I digress, ok, back to my point (and I do have one)–tonight, my son went to dinner at a restaurant (not fast food) with a group of buddies.  There is a part of me that wonders “What mom lets her 13 year-old go to dinner alone with a group of buddies” (apparently at least six of them do) and the other part is thinking “He is never going to understand the concept of adding a tip to a bill unless I let him go.”  As I left him there I did remind him that this is where basic math is used “Honey, you have $20, you’ll need to use your math, because that is ALL you have.”  He smiled and went in.

This all seems so sudden to me–that he would want to go and do this.  Then, I sit down and start typing–oh yeah, he has moved from Harry Potter underwear, to boxer briefs to boxers in the past 4 years.  His Buzz Lightyear sheets made way for Star Wars and now NFL helmets and I’m sure by summer’s end he’ll ask for plain.  (he does still need a light in the bathroom to sleep, but he can use his little sister for that excuse).  He’s also gone from needing me to be on the same floor as him in the house at all times to staying home alone for an afternoon.

Where did the time go?

I was there the whole time, even though I worked part or full-time all the years.  I have driven him to countless rehearsals, football games/practices, basketball, baseball.  We have shared the love of theatre, watched a ton of movies, held confessional in the car.  I know he loves me, even when he says he hates my guts.  But, all of a sudden, I look up at him (yes, up…I’m vertically challenged and he’s grown 5 in this year) and think “Oh crap, I have to let go again!”  I know this is only the beginning, he’s now old enough to order his own food, pay for it with his own money, and only needs a ride there and back.  Soon enough, he won’t need the ride.

As Toy Story 3 comes out in June, it will be met with excitement and trepedation.  I don’t think we can truly watch that movie without a box of tissues.  He was the BIGGEST Toy Story 1 & 2 fan that ever lived.  The new plot, if you have not seen it, has Andy going to college (GASP!) and the toys going to a daycare.  It is a familiar story to most parents who took their kids to the first movie 15 years ago–those kids are about 17-20…so it resonates with them.  This is letting go you wish for as a parent–taking little Andy to college and making his room the office.  However, the music and flashbacks on the trailer had both my sensitive son and I in tears. 

I guess in a way, we’re both finding it hard to let go…

Written by zima-mom

May 19, 2010 at 12:28 am

Posted in Uncategorized

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